Started: 02:13
Page check: 28
I was, and still am, photocopying a mother long document. 45 pages mother long, and only just decided to write while photkoping. Social experiment on my favourite society, me.

Today is some kind of insect day. At the mosque, a wild beetle too happy to be free, flew around in its ecstasy, colliding with a man before falling off dizzy. Man beside him then casually proceeded to pick up beetle and dispose (read fling lightly) outside of mosque (read a few metres away because the iktikaf area starts near the entrance. We were at the iktikaf area).

And while praying this beetle, once again consumed in joy, decided to go a-flying again. Initially I thought it was a cockroach, which would have added 2000 freak points. And in my prayer this beetle crashed yet again, this time into the ceiling (wow...) and fell into an inverted flatspin. Not that I saw, I'm just... dramaticizing. It tried to regain control! Frontal thrusters engage! But crashed into my shoulder and dropped away. I got a shocked and thankfully just shook like WHOA kinda shook, but nothing serious. I thought the beetle was gone.

Until.

Five minutes after prayer I'm sitting and feel something on my toe. Wee bit early to cramp, eh? Proceed to massage foot then... massage... massage... ouch! Something sharp. My pants? Nah my pants aren't sharp? Ouch! There it is again! So I looked at my pants, and found the beetle clinging on for dear life, just above the back of my knee. It was yay high- 7cm - and black and clingy. Whhuuuuuut. So I tried dusting it off, but it was very clingy. So I had to, uh, touch it. Yech. And peel it off my pants and it flew away. Two feet away, and sat there forever till a pakcik carried it away on his way out.

I will know assume the pakcik's position:

Yay selawat, selawaaaat, selawaaat. Alamak... macam haus ah (like thirsty ah. hahahahah). Ok there's water outside, best I venture forth to nourish mine thirsty throat.
Up you go, ah yes. K let's walk out now. Ladee daa, selawating people everywhere, ladee- eh! What's this! A beetle, on the floor! Kiamun, thn ooyl bring yeh ba' teh where yeh suppos' teh bee, thn.

Page check: 29. Great.
Time check: 02:24. Greater. K more photaaakeping less writing.


Oh in my boredom I also wrote something of a rap. I wanted it to be a rap and it sounded like a rap in my mind till I got past the first sentence. Then the rhythm kept changing, the best and the tune, and I lost it all. You can find it here and while it may not be of good reading value, I wish it would at least NOT cause you any pain or harm. Please, laugh if you must, I like making people happy.

BACK TO WHY ITS INSECT DAY!

Came home and just after passing the staircase I noticed this huge ass praying mantis sitting atop. Araknow what it was doing. Can't possibly be praying, it was- oh wow it WAS facing the kiblat hahahhaha. Anyway mraying pantises I MEAN praying mantises are creepy. Then at home I found out that another huge ass praying mantis had showed up in the study room and freaked my brother out. My father apparently flung it out the balcony window... which is at the extreme opposite end of the main door (where you'll find the staircase).

So, all detective sounding (hardly move your jaw while reading this, muffle everything and put on your best wise-ass accent), there's either two praying mantises or the former found a way to somehow make its way around the building, and wait at the staircase. Assuming the first case, it really is insect day. Assuming the second, this mantis is stalking you. Either way, its creepy.

So for awhile, and now again, cos I'm recollecting everything, I was very. Very. Very. Cautious about my life. I walked into the study room and clicked on the light then SUDDENLY REMEMBERED and jumped back out. I scanned the entire entrance for signs of Mr Mantis, before giving up and not going into the study room at all. Now I'm afraid to do life-essential things like walk, sleep, sit, you name it. I'm really afraid it might show up somewhere.

We ALL know how deadly insects are. If they don't gorge your eyes out or sting you to death they'll just infiltrate your head via your ears or mouth, and you're a goner.

Dear God, I beg of you. Please protect us from this praying mantis. Please don't let any mantis come near or into our house again.

That's enough of talk I'm freaking myself out more.

Time check: 02:34
Page check: 34. Ok not bad I'm done writing anyway.
Tissue check: 94,326 pieces used. 7 cm mountain beside left hand.

Something went wrong somewhere, my body started behaving all cold-like at 2 am last night. Still is symptompshy but its dealwithable.

Finished: 02:54
Page check: 38, run out of paper hahahhahah. More tomorrow.

Its okay to cry. But what are you crying for? Plain emotional responses to stimuli are hardly worth any credit or effort. That's what all of that has taught me. And all the guys in that situation will agree its the most macho thing to do. Don't understand? Think about it more, maybe connect a few dots. And while you're at it, remember to live beautifully and with respect.





I still look my best behind a pillar

Labels: repotr, thoughts