The result of it was that I was left extremely tired, hungry and grumpy. And people just have to be irritating when I'm grumpy. Some things that happened, and what I would've loved to say but didn't. Only cos I'm a nice guy *cue: angelic chorus*
Me and my bros ended up at the library, reading. Mak calls to check on our locomotion. I answer her short question in one word, barely loud enough for ME to hear, and already the genius ass librarian senses something wrong.
Immediately says in her best authoritative voice: EXCUSE ME.
WHAT, BITCH? I'm done. You couldn't even hear me talking. Your frickin' 'excuse me' was a hell lot louder, but ooooh that's ok, cos you're a fookin' librarian. OOOOOHHHHHH I'm so scaaaaaared. Oh gosh now look what yeh did, I've wet mah pants! DANG you rock.
But nah I was like: hmm what? as I kept my phone, and she was like 'm oh. ah, ok.' There's only one word for that... and we all know its got to do with female dogs.
Then there's a mother acting all Strict HR Representative, Don't Give Me Shit... with her 8 year old DAUGHTER. Come on give her a break! She's a girl!
Hehehehhe. But seriously, if you ever become a parent, please let your children love you with only love, and not after getting scared shit. It confuses them and they don't know how to react. I know cos I'm still 8 TADUM CHANG.
I found good books today, rilly rilly good books:
I, Lucifer by Glen Duncan. Totally love it.
Wit and Its Relation to the Unconscious by FREUD. FREUD IS THE MAN.
The Ninth Circle by Alex Bell. Not sure about this one but the blurb looked good, the typeface was alright, so I'm giving it a shot.
The Power of Concentration by Theron Q. Dumont. Hahahah seriously. I think its gonna be good.
Just awhile ago I had to help my uncle (Mama) (yeah that Uncle) (hahahaha yeah I told him) get his contacts sorted out on his new phone. I thought it was gonna be fairly uncomplicated, but nooo Apple likes to shit around with you, and they made iTunes which is a steaming pile of crap (sometimes) and get all Creative with their iPoop.
I was happily doing everything when POOF all of my uncle's contacts disappeared. Only one word was running through my mind, and they appeared as, uh, well... f*** bubbles above my head. I was trying so hard not to think the F word cos its damn unholy so it might just cause things to get worse. Like random lightning strike, exploding speakers. Who can tell. But no it was scary as hell and thankfully Mama sensed what I was thinking. Saved me the embarrassment and stress of having to curse repeatedly in his presents.
I did everything by the book and it STILL fooked up; but in the end all went well and so I know I'll be able to sleep tonight.
AND ALSO! Amazing discovery: when I was in that panicky state, I was TOTALLY normal. In the sense that I didn't speak in any accents, no weird shit, no nuttin' you usually get out of me.
I conclude then that the Billboard me is a sign of total relaxation, when I'm really, uh, well I don't know a good word. Once I stop talking to myself/in foreign tongues/accents/anything you've come across, it means I've gotten serious.
If I've gotten serious, its because I'm:
1) scared shit as hell
2) really too mehh and tired sleepy to give a fk
3) really wanna concentrate on what's going on. This could be if you're talking to me seriously, or someone just caught fire and is running around screaming for help. Be sure I won't start playing the unimpressed Scotsman, yelling things like 'Ahhh yeh wee lad, good for nu'in gob-spi'in fairy-winged twig. Go boast about yer fire sumwhere ELSE now, yeh dipstick.'
I must really sleep now. In yet another level of Altered / Augmented State of Consciousness. Hell I' gonna sto' ehre.
sleep
Labels: monstrothimisticism, repotr